Considerations....

I have not blogged now for a couple months. I have to confess to having a bit of a scare, in that I joined a yahoo group, and I know this blog is listed on my profile.

I consider my mind a pretty private place, and to be honest, I really do not know why I started this blog in the first place, but I do know I really didnt want that group to have that much of a view into my mind.

I guess it all comes down to the fear of being too visible, and thus too vunerable. I really have nothing to hide, but nor do I leave my shades open at night while I change into my sleeping hat.

But, how else do deep considerations get passes along?

My noodlings this week concern the prospects of job once again. I am bored where I am. I have mastered the job, its details, and several other projects and need a challenge. I have discovered I thrive on such challenges and diversity. I need something new to look forward to, and a changing environment. The job market for me present a Delano. Either I go into something very similar, or back to a major effort and responsibility. While I most likely need something like a major job, they still scare me a bit. It hasn't been too long since the prior burn out.

Lets see. My "ideal" job would involve flexibility. Not always at the same chair, in the same office, but some movement. Pay would have to be at least a good improvement over what I am currently earning, which I am pretty happy about. No over time. No instability, or insecurity. It would have to be working with people, and offering some benefit to them. (I cant just make money, I have to be making a difference). It would be days, not many weekends, if any at all.

Seems I need more noodling on this. :)

professir.

Nothing ever happens........

I saw a quote this week.

"Nothing ever happens in the past, nor does anything happen in the future. It always happens in the present."

I like that. I have to confess to living too much in the future, and enduring too much from the past. I seem to be "achievement" orientated, in that I work for some future achievement. "If I learn to draw a tree, my drawings in the future will be better" then just enjoying the tree. My work at my desk is done most dilligently with the mindset that it will achieve me a better desk, a good name, whatever. So I have been taking stock in this and "noodling" on what, if anything I wish to change.

First, I am getting pretty good about keeping the past there. I can now reconize its black head when the past presents itself as an obstical to the present. So, my true task is to learn how to enjoy myself. The key seems to be, as usual, an inventory of what I find "fun" rather then productive.

I know, I should make a list of what I do/enjoy that is achievement oriantated. :D That way, I will be able to regulate my activities to just those that are fun, and not pay so much homage to the future.

I should start on that right away, and get a heads up on enjoying myself after this.

(*psssst, sarcasm alert)

professer

National Day of Prayer.

Its humbling to consider the importance of prayer. Its not the pitition that is so awesome, but the responsibility. God Himself WANTS me to pray.

Wow.

Me.

Somehow a litany of blessings seems trivial. A grocery list of requests cheap. No, the responsibility of prayer is in the listening. There is really nothing of importance I have to say, other then thank you!

This National Day of Prayer 2005 holds one prayer for me in my journal...."Dear God, use me for your will"

the kneeling professir

Hard situtations and hard stands.....

I have been watching the Episcopal Churchs battle with the issue of a gay clergy/Bishop. Seems it has reached critical mass and 6 pastors are asking to be under the direction of another Bishop, refusing to accept the authority of the gay bishop. Its a sad day that the situtation has reached this point. I cant help but feel its another time where "politicaly correct" rules over Biblical authority.

I have read the Bible ragarding the gay lifestyle. There can be little dabate that the Scriptures condems homosexuality. Yet, we want to make everyone feel "comfortable and accepted" to the point we want to rewrite Scriptures. This is a slippery road indeed. Where does that Biblical line have to be drawn? I realize there is a HUGE difference between a gay person, and a praticing gay person, much like the difference between an alcholic and a drinking alcholic. But, this does not seem to be the issue. While we are all sinners, the difference is that we should reconize that sin, and be on the path to correct it, or at least convicted of its wrongness in the sight of God. As a lay person, I can say, I want to know that my spiritual leader has the walk with God to see sin, and be working on it, not celebrating it and flaunting it with pride.

I know our society wants to please everyone. I know its "politicaly correct" to celebrate all kinds of diversity, to enbrace each other and accept people where they are, but I DONT see the courage to say things as they are. I thing racism, sexism, slander and bigotry in ANY color, taste or level is still bogotry! At a recent diversity workshop, I stated that I DONT CARE what color my boss is, provided they are competent. To offer advantages to "minorities" is racism. To say, we should give added consideration for the sake of diversity, is to give the nod to JUST as foul example of bigotry as we have been fighting to avoid since the 60's marches. The "glass ceiling" the white top, the moral right. All of this reeks of bigotry. This can be the only reason a church would knownly approve a bishop that is gay. Scripture is very clear with its views on homosexualty.

I am disappointed with the Episcopal Church, and the Methodist Church for even considering gay clergy. As was said in Ezekiel 37:3 "Will these dry bones live?" Only God knows.

Civilization lost today.......Maybe.

I just received word that Terri Schiavo just died. The news is saying that she wanted to be limited on her life support in the event of something happening to her physically and her husband has been trying to enforce her wishes. I cant tell from here of course, but I can say, the topic of life and death should be a more prevalent conversation in our society. We don't take the end very seriously I think. Most folks never consider what they truly would like if they were injured like Terri was. Would you want to be kept alive at any costs? Would you REALLY want to be starved to death with no water or food over a 2 week period? Would we allow a pet dog to starve to death that way?

These questions confront the values and beliefs of the questioner. Do we believe there is life after death? If so, what does that mean to our quest to live? I believe there is life after death here on earth. I believe we are souls traveling this life for a time, then we return to the spirit world. Spiritual beings that are existing as humans for the time being. This effects my views of the life and death questions. I want to be kept alive as long as possible. I want every opportunity to prove a miracle. But, when the time comes that God decides for me to die, (and nothing can keep me alive when God deems it time), I will be ready to return to the spirit world. What heaven will be like is anyone's guess, but I intend on finding out.

This question of supporting life is deep. Any decision has its ramifications and further questions. If one declares that they do NOT want too much life support, how is the best way to allow that person to die? With dignity and humanely. If the person wants to have the efforts made, then how does the family have to suffer for that decision? Would I really want MyLady to have to deal with me in that state for years and years? How do I want my family to remember me?

I hope I fall off the porch at age 119 and die quickly,with no expenses and be cremated quickly. The cost should be about $350.00. If only life could be so clean and easy.

I challenge everyone that reads this to consider all these questions. Don't forget the question of eternal life as well. Times like this naturally bring up the question of God, afterlife, heaven, spiritual life. I encourage you to find your way to God in your personal way, and come to peace with that, before any life/death decisions are made. Think carefully.

the peaceful professir.